My Dad

The BBBC topic for today is to write about something that is important to us. I'm going to write about my father because father's day is coming up soon.

I've always been a "daddy's girl." When I was a little girl, I thought my father was the be all and end all of the universe. He knew everything there was to know about any subject. And even when he didn't know the answer to one of my questions he would make something up that I believed without question. Once we were driving past a hayfield and the hay stacks were covered in white plastic to protect them from rain. I asked my father what the big white blobs were and he told me in all seriousness that it was a marshmallow farm. I believed it. And it wasn't until I was about 13 years old that I found out the truth about the "marshmallows." But that's what my father is like. He has a great imagination and if something can be improved with a little magic or silliness he'll do it. He's great at telling stories and reading aloud. He read me stories every night. When he was out for the night my grandma or babysitter would offer to read to me but I'd always refuse because they weren't nearly as good at telling the story as my dad was. He's a teacher now and I've seen him read to his students. They hang on his every word just as I used to.

When I was about 14, my parents split up. It was a messy divorce with lots of bitterness and it was hard to see my mother so broken up about it. I became her best friend and confidant at an age when I shouldn't really have to hear about grown-up problems and the intimate details of my parent's relationship. I love my mother and I understand what she was going through and how she needed to talk to me but it was still difficult and it led to a lot of anger and bitterness towards my dad. I couldn't believe he had left ME. Everything is about yourself when you are a child or a teenager. I couldn't comprehend the fact that my parents were individuals with their own feelings and struggles. They were supposed to be perfect and they were supposed to cater to all my needs and never have any problems of their own.

There were years of estrangement from my father. I refused to go see him or talk to him. I cut him out of my life. Sometimes, I'd be filled with so much anger and hurt that I would write him long, hateful letters and send them to him. I'd blame him for everything that went wrong in my life. "If dad hadn't left, this wouldn't be happening..." etc.

But my dad has always been a hero. From the time I was a baby he was always there for me when I needed him. When I was five, I lost my Snoopy in a shopping mall. I have had Snoopy since I was a couple of days old and I still have him. He's a bit ragged now but I slept with him every night and took him everywhere so he's been through a lot. That night, I was being tucked into bed when I realized Snoopy was gone. I was frantic. I could not be consoled. My dad drove back to the mall in the dark of night and spent two hours searching through the snow and the slush on the off-chance that I'd dropped Snoopy in the parking lot. And he found him!!!

He's always been my rock. Whenever something awful happened he was there. Fights with best friends, humiliations, the pain of having a crush on a boy that didn't know I existed. When I broke my leg he was with me every day in the hospital and helped me recuperate when I got out of the hospital.

And last year when my ex beat me up after I broke up with him I called my father and he drove eight hours to come and get me and bring me back to his house. I had no money and no home and I was broken and scared out of my wits. But my father took me in and helped me get well and made me feel safe again. I stayed with him for six months and I'm so glad we spent that time together because I reconnected with him and I know now that no matter what happens in my life my dad will always be there for me. I'm so grateful to have a dad like him and I hope I can be a good daughter to him.

"Sail on silvergirl, sail on by

Your time has come to shine

All your dreams are on their way

See how they shine?

If you need a friend, I'm sailing right behind

Like a bridge over troubled water, I will ease your mind..."

-"Bridge over troubled water" Simon and Garfunkel